You're what now?
by Complexly Simple Kiddo
Summary: A week after Kurt decides to go back to McKinley, Blaine follows, much to his own chagrin, because he is, and will always be, a Dalton boy through and through. Dapper Blaine let loose at McKinley is not something Kurt looks forward to. Established Klaine
1. Chapter 1

**AN: It can't really be called speculation, because I'm pretty sure this won't happen. But then again...**

**Established Klaine. It could fit after my Home for Christmas fic easily. They get together, and then Kurt decides he wants to be back at McKinley. And not a week after, Blaine follows, much to his own chagrin. Because he's trough and trough, a Dalton boy. **

* * *

Kurt suddenly stopped his brisk walk down the hallway of McKinley High for what felt like the millionth time this week, and stood there, mouth agape in what was sure to be a very dumb and unflattering look, but he couldn't care less. This time, he wasn't stopping to change directions because the K-threat –as his fellow glee clubbers had come to name Karofsky, among other, less flattering nicknames- had been spotted, or because he once again confused his school schedule, the Dalton classes still very fresh in his mind.

No, this time, it was because a very welcome but bizarre scene was in front of him, and he was positively sure he either finally managed to go insane, or somehow, his life had a time warp gone wrong and he was now stuck between two dimensions. In his mind, there really was no better explanation, and that was saying something.

He could also be hallucinating. Maybe that brown gelled haired, or those five feet and seven inches tall, or those controlled and polite yet extremely expressive gesticulations weren't really the ones he had known for the past days.

Maybe that wasn't Blaine at all, standing in the middle of McKinley High with a school bag and a school schedule in his hands and talking to Ms. Olano, who he knew was in charge of new students.

And even though he knew it was positively impossible, he still walked up to him, probably with his dumb expression still adorning his features.

Then the boy turned, and he had the same hazel brown eyes of Blaine, and oh, look! The very same charming smile.

"Kurt, hi," he said, like it was the most common and normal thing. Kurt had to look around. The roof wasn't falling; the floor wasn't sinking, no apocalypse horses coming his way to take him away. He looked back to find time-warp-gone-wrong version of Blaine still looking at him.

"I- I'm sorry," Kurt said, managing to mesh a laugh and a snort at the same time "have I slipped on a buttered floor again and hit my head so bad that I'm having walking hallucinations, or has my life become some sort of messed up crossover?" he asked, clutching his books to his chest as if for dear life, and still staring at the boy in front of him in utter disbelief. Blaine just laughed silently and turned to the teacher, who had been staring at Kurt like he had gone mad. He couldn't blame her.

"I think I can take it from here, Ms. Olano. Thank you very much for your time"

"Not at all, Mr. Anderson," she said, clearly amazed at the utter politeness of the boy "Make sure to ask me if you need anything at all"

"I will"

Kurt watched her go with amusement, while his face was still sporting the surprise, so it was probably a very weird face, but, once again, he didn't care.

"I think she's in love," he commented, seeing how the teacher was so taken back by a teenage boy's ability to speak properly, and then his eyes went wider "oh my god, no teacher is safe with you here, you're going to charm them all with your dapper ways"

"I'm glad to see I'll be well received then," he laughed, and that woke Kurt from his trance and he looked back at Blaine, still thinking he might be some hallucination.

"What the hell are you doing here?" asked Kurt in an urgent whisper. The fact that Blaine was dressed in fit jeans and a V neck white t-shirt with a black jacket didn't go unnoticed.

"I changed schools," Blaine said, shrugging nonchalantly and still managing to look classy. Kurt could have laughed if it weren't for the fact that he was occupied trying to make sense into all of this.

"What, why? What?" he sputtered, not even able to form a coherent sentence. "That is absurd! You can't just- oh god," he suddenly said, panic in his face clear as water "please tell me you didn't change schools because of some sort of knight complex trying to protect me thinking it would be romantic because that would be utterly stupid in so many levels," he said, not even pausing to take some air. Blaine laughed again.

"No, I didn't change schools to be with you, although it is a very welcome bonus. You know as well as I do that I belong at Dalton just as much as you belong to McKinley. We established that last week when you decided to come back, much to my chagrin. Look," he sighed, taking Kurt's arm gently and leading him to an empty classroom "I don't like this any more than you do. I cringed at the school program when I read it over, education here is really behind compared to Dalton, and I don't look forward to all the mocking that is sure to come. I know I don't belong here, Kurt, but I have no choice. My parents got a design project that requires them to be for many months at Germany, and they irrationally decided to leave me with my uncle, who said that he refused to take care of me if I stayed at home in Westerville, claiming the two hour trip was one he was NOT going to make everyday."

"Why don't you just board?" asked Kurt, still with disbelief painting his tone. Blaine sighed again.

"Because, apparently, my parents think that boarding will lead me to misbehave. I know," he said, before Kurt could even start complaining about how ridiculous that was "it's absolutely insane, but I can't change their minds. At the very least, it's going to be for just two months. Why they think that two months of worse education is better than risking his son being exposed to hypothetical mischief, I won't pretend to know."

"It just doesn't make any sense. You being at McKinley is so wrong," Kurt said, staring at the wall in some kind of awed trance, and then turned to Blaine when he saw his frown "I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm… It's nice to be able to have you in the same school again, but it's just wrong. You really belong at Dalton, Blaine. I… You here, I don't see it happening"

"Me neither," laughed Blaine, thinking about his first experience in the parking lot where he was almost rolled over by a bad student driver who refused to even look at him when he said very politely that he should be careful. He reached out to take Kurt's hands in his, resting against a desk "but we can make it work. And you can't deny that it's exciting to be together in the same school again, no matter how bizarre the circumstances are."

Kurt relaxed, feeling Blaine's thumb caress his knuckles gently, and relishing in the contact. With the last week occupied in getting used to his old life, he hadn't have much time to spend with Blaine, and he really missed him.

"At least I get to see you out of your uniform," joked Kurt, feeling a smile tug at his lips, looking Blaine up and down in such a blatant way that it left Blaine laughing silently, and he tugged at Kurt's hands to get him closer, and put his hands on the boy's hips. And then Kurt's smile disappeared, and a look of complete horror replaced him, taking Blaine's hands away from his hips and taking a step back, as if something had burn him.

"No, Blaine, you can't," he said, his eyes going wide with terror "you can blend in, it will be easy for you, you can avoid all the heat. And you need to stay out of glee, and maybe you could join the football team or something, you're good at sports, they'll totally believe you"

Blaine opened his mouth to stop Kurt but decided to let him finish, and the silence grew longer, with Kurt staring at him with wide eyes and Blaine staring back with a patient look.

"Are you asking me to hide the fact that I'm gay, AND your boyfriend, not indulge in the activities I like the most, and play the role of a jock, just to avoid being mocked at?"

"You don't understand, Blaine, it's not going to be simple mocking!" he almost shouted, desperately trying to get his point across. "You can't understand, you've been at Dalton for too long, you don't even suspect how bad it can be, and they're going to eat you alive! Why are you doing this! You CAN blend in, Blaine, why would you choose to expose yourself like this?"

"Kurt… I have to be honest; I don't understand why you're saying all this. You out of anyone should know no one should have to hide who they really are. You're asking me to hide everything I love, just to avoid the heat, when you have been true to yourself since day one."

"Yes, and then I got a death threat and had to go to Dalton, remember?" he asked, in mock sarcasm, but Blaine just reached out and pulled Kurt to him again, gently. He was reluctant, and threw a worried look at the door, but the halls were mostly deserted.

"And yet you're back again, fighting your demons"

"That's different!" he exclaimed, rolling his eyes but indulging himself, letting Blaine put his arms around his waist. He had really missed being with him.

"Why is it different?"

"Because you're not me! You can blend in, and you're refusing to do so for stupid reasons"

"Is it stupid that I want the world to see you be with me?"

"You just quoted 'Hey soul sister', and yes, it is stupid" Kurt said in a deadpan voice, frowning at Blaine but also enjoying his proximity and his dorky smile.

"Come on, give me a chance. I want to try being as brave as you" Kurt frowned deeper. That was an argument that never lead anywhere. Blaine was set on thinking he had been a coward for having run from his old school because of, as he said, 'simple taunting', when Kurt had put up with so much more. Kurt just thought bravery had many faces, and Blaine was brave in his own personal way, in ways that Kurt didn't have. But Blaine kept staring at him, almost imploringly, and Kurt shielded, if only reluctantly. He placed both hands in Blaine's shoulders, staring at him worriedly.

"I'm just worried they'll hurt you, Blaine"

"Well, think of it this way," he said, with a light tone to ease Kurt's seriousness, and he pushed himself higher in order to be only inches apart from Kurt's face "now you know what it feels like to be in my shoes." He reduced the distance, kissing Kurt lightly, not letting him reply or dwell too much on the issue. When they parted, Kurt was still looking worried, but he looked like he wasn't going to argue anymore. At least for now.

"You don't even have nice shoes, Blaine," he joked, and they both smiled.

Then Kurt frowned again, and rolled his eyes.

"Oh god, if you join the glee club, they're going to panic about this. It has Jesse St. James written all over it"

Blaine just stared at him in a mix of amusement, confusion, and surprise.

"What does my cousin have to do with all of this?" Kurt stared at him like he had gone crazy, and then sputtered, raising his hands away from Blaine as if he was suddenly poisonous.

"Your WHAT?"

XXXXXXXX

**AN: This is a bad case of self indulgence. The idea of having Blaine at McKinley was bouncing in my head, and I was thinking 'it would be so absurd to have dapper Blaine in that place'. I mean, it's hard to even justify his existence there! But it wouldn't leave me alone. And then, this strange harboring idea of Jesse St. James being Blaine's cousin. I know I read it somewhere, and it grew on me. I have literally no idea where I'm going with this, I'm not even sure I should continue it. I just needed to write something, since I am a bit stuck with Ruffled Feathers, and I needed to rest my feathery mind for a second before tackling the Christmas episode. I'm uploading it, just because it's already written, and who knows, maybe you'll enjoy it, and maybe I'll really continue it. The idea is still there, after all. Dapper Blaine in McKinley. Absurd, right? And yet… So very amusing… Will they scare his dapper self away, or will he win them over with his utter charisma?**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Hey guys! Thank you so much for the feedback! It made me smile a lot! **

**One thing I wanted to make clear, though. English is not my first language, and it is pretty much self taught, so I do have a lot of grammar, verb tenses, and punctuation mistakes. I know some people are bothered by it, so I try to get a beta for my more serious stories (Like Ruffled Feathers). Since this fic is not really that serious yet, and I'm just having fun, I don't have a beta for this. I do hope you enjoy it anyway, even if it probably sucks to read with so many mistakes. I do apologize for them, but if you point them out to me, I'll try to learn and fix them as I go. Thank youuu :3**

**You're a what now?**

**ComplexlySimpleKiddo**

"So your mother's brother is Jesse's father. This feels like a bad, cheap drama setting, Blaine."

They were heading for second period, the only one they shared in their Monday schedules, and Kurt could not shake the worry out of his head.

Did he dream about having a boyfriend as out and proud as he was, and be able to walk with him through the hallways of high school, linking hands and singing songs at each other in glee club, and sharing lunch and maybe go to prom and slow dance? Yes, even the things that he claimed were horribly cheesy. But now that the possibility was there, not one of those things crossed his mind. Instead, he kept picturing Blaine suffering all kinds of high school torture, having to endure what he had, and worst of all; he was still terribly worried about Karofsky. He hadn't figured out why he had kissed him, if it was because he was confused and Kurt was the only gay kid he knew of and used him as a test, then maybe having Blaine there would help him get used to the idea of being gay himself, having around more than just one gay guy. Blaine could actually show him that you didn't have to be as flamboyant as Kurt if you were gay. But if Karofsky had some sort of feelings for Kurt, the countertenor shuddered to even imagine about the kind of things that Blaine had coming at him.

"I had no idea you guys knew him. I mean, I know you competed against Vocal Adrenaline last year, but I knew nothing about the whole Rachel drama. No wonder your friends were so doubtful of me at first."

"Well, yes, your cousin is a total prick. And they're going to be even more doubtful now that you moved in with them, changed schools, and you're my boyfriend," Kurt said, lowering his voice to almost a whisper at the end, which made Blaine stop in his tracks, taking Kurt's hand to make him stop too. Kurt looked torn between enjoying Blaine's hand on his, or be worried about the stares. Blaine seemed blissfully uncaring of the attention, and Kurt, again, felt torn about loving that, or being worried about Blaine's idealistic mind.

"Stop that. We are NOT hiding, ok? Let them bring whatever they want; I'm going to do my thing. And that involves dating you," he said that in a clear voice that made many look away, self consciously "joining glee club, and joining the football team"

At that Kurt couldn't help but raise both eyebrows.

"Do you want to cure cancer, too?" Kurt said, sarcasm dripping from his tone, but Blaine just gave him a patient look and Kurt sighed. "Fine, go about it your way. But at the first signs of distress, we change to my plan, ok?"

"I'll let you be my knight in shiny, fashionable armor," Blaine joked, both finally arriving at their shared French class.

"I could punch you, you know? Or kick you, at the very least. You're lucky I l…" he stopped himself from saying it, realizing he was already inside the student filled room, but Blaine went to his seat and smiled charmingly up at Kurt, and said in a calm, amused tone.

"I know. I love you too," and he, just as calmly, took out his math textbook out of his bag, while Kurt sat on his own desk, feeling his face as red as the school walls. He kept his eyes straight ahead, trying not to find out if anyone was staring, and he pretty much kept doing that until the end of the class. When the school bell rang, he left the classroom at top speed; he had never managed to gather his books so fast. Blaine caught up to him in the middle of the hallway.

"Come on, are you mad at me?" asked Blaine, trying to catch Kurt's eyes, which were fixed on an undefined spot ahead of him.

"I am not mad, Blaine, I just don't want to encourage social suicide," Kurt said, not stopping his brisk walk, and Blaine just rolled his eyes at him, still trying to keep up.

"Says the guy that's wearing tight white jeans and a pink shirt. Not that I'm complaining, though," he said, trying to refrain his eyes from wondering to improper places.

"That's different, that's fashion," defended Kurt, but there was a faint redness in his cheeks, having recognized the subtle compliment.

"So you're saying that you can be yourself, but I can't"

"No! That's not…" Kurt stopped walking, and looked pointedly at his boyfriend, trying not to blow his exasperation on Blaine's face. "I'm not saying you can't be yourself, you can try your approach as much as you want, but don't ask me to encourage something that I _know_ will go wrong, Blaine!"

"Hey, homo, are those lady tights you're wearing?"

The voice came from down the hall, and Kurt didn't even need to turn around to recognize the irritating drawl of Azimio's voice. He could see Blaine's well dissimulated shock, and slight anger, but little of this was visible, because he had always that calm exterior. Blaine was already opening his mouth to say something, and Kurt knew very well what he would try to do. But it would be no good, not with Azimio, not with anyone at this school. So he interrupted Blaine, locking eyes with him, not even looking at his bully.

"It's called having a sense of fashion and a body to use it. Neither of which you would be able to understand"

"Well I call it being a fag!" spat the jock. This time, Blaine was faster than Kurt, and looked at the black boy over Kurt's shoulder.

"I'm sorry, but that's offensive. And I would also appreciate if you stopped staring at my boyfriend's assets. I am well aware how tight those jeans are, and trust me, he's not wearing them for your appreciation," he said, very politely. Azimio's face turn into confusion. The combination of being talked back by an unknown kid, and the words used made comprehension of what was being said to come a bit late, but he finally caught up with what Blaine was saying.

"What the hell, Hummel? You infested another student?"

"Oh yes, and if you don't run, it's going to catch you too!" Kurt said, turning around and keeping Blaine between himself and the locker, just in case. Azimio got closer, pissed off.

"You watch your mouth, Hummel! Or I swear I'll…"

A teacher came down the hall, typically unaware of the surroundings, but it was enough to make Azimio stop for a second, and Kurt took the opportunity to grab Blaine by the arm and drag him through the hallways and out of sight, into an empty room.

"Calculus is on the opposite side of school, I'll be late for the class," said Blaine, once Kurt closed the door and let him go. The fashionista turned around, frowning and trying hard not to get angry.

"You don't even need the damn class, Blaine, you're way ahead in your math."

There was a long silence between them, both staring at each other, measuring their words.

"Why did you stop me? I could have taken care of him my own way," asked Blaine, with a very calm, smooth voice. He sounded like he was dealing with a dangerous and cornered animal, which was pretty much the case.

"Because," Kurt answered, still trying to keep calm. Blaine always made him control his own outbursts, because Kurt felt they were wrong in front of Blaine's cool front. "This was not your problem to face. He was insulting me, and I don't need a knight. I have been taking care of this stuff since I was six years old and I learnt what 'fag' meant, Blaine! I don't need anyone to fight my battles! And _your_ way is going to get you slushied in the face every single day, and get you tossed into dumpsters, and get you pushed into lockers, and…" he stopped then, because he suddenly had Karofsky's face on his mind, too close to his own to even think about the amount of fear and disgust he had experienced. And thinking about Blaine getting the same thing was just too much. "You have to face them with sarcasm, and wit, and just get the hell away from their radar. That's how you deal with them"

"Did it work for you? Didn't you still get slushied, and tossed into dumpsters, and worse?" asked Blaine, trying to reason with him. He smiled sadly, shrugging his shoulders and staring at him with earnest eyes, and continued with his soft voice "You won't even let me try, Kurt. You tell me you don't need someone to defend you, but that's what you're trying to do with me. Let me get slushied, let me get tossed into dumpsters," said Blaine, raising his hands and looking around, as if saying the school worked that way. "Let me deal with it my way. I won't run away this time"

"I didn't mean it like that!" said Kurt instantly, but Blaine just shook his head, silently reassuring him that he knew. It was only Blaine who still felt shame about that episode. Not Kurt, never him.

Blaine reached out to Kurt and slipped his hand into his, squeezing softly. He inclined his head, trying to catch Kurt's lowered gaze.

"I don't need a knight, Kurt, and neither do you. But that does not mean we can't team up," Kurt finally raised his eyes, meeting Blaine's always understanding ones, and the soft but encouraging smile that always came with them. Kurt couldn't help but smile a little. Regretful, and shy, and awkward, but still smile.

"You need to understand Kurt, because I know this is something new to you. When he called you a 'fag', he was no longer offending one student in this school. He was offending both of us."

Kurt bit his lip, taking a deep breath, and nodding, once. He stood straighter, making the few inches he had over Blaine in height more noticeable. Then he smiled, in a more natural way now.

"You're really going to be late for class. And you don't want to get Mr. Thomson on your bad side"

Blaine smiled with more intensity, and leaned forward to press his lips against Kurt, softly, but with certain urgency. He raised his hand to place it against Kurt's face, dragging his thumb across the boy's cheekbone, before parting. Their eyes met for a silent, tense second, in which they seemed to come to some sort of unspoken agreement, and then Blaine smirked at him.

"Come on, you think I cannot charm him into forgiveness?" he said, and then adopted an apologetically, bewildered and credibly sincere tone "I got so confused about the school layout, I'm really sorry; it's very difficult to get used to a new architecture, professor."

"You could charm the damn sun out of rising in the morning, Blaine. I don't need further proof of _that_"

XXXXXXXXX

"Kurt, this school is academically terrible," complained Blaine, sitting on a vacant seat next to the countertenor, placing his tray carefully on the table that many of the glee clubbers were sharing. When he looked up to find the whole table staring at him in surprise, except for Kurt, it took a few seconds to understand what was going on. "Oh, hi, by the way. I'm Blaine"

"We know who you are, but…" Tina started, confused, and she looked at Artie, hoping he would have answers.

"What are you doing here?" asked Mercedes, in a defensive tone.

"I go here now"

"Oh what the hell?" said Artie, raising his hands and looking at Blaine with confusion.

"This… this is insane! He's clearly here to steal information about us" exclaimed Rachel, and Kurt had to silently laugh about the outraged tone before he came to Blaine's defense.

"Ok, stop right there. First of all, he really was transferred, but it will only last a few months. Hopefully" he added, with a pointed glare at Blaine. "And second, I was the one who transferred to his school first and then came back; I might as well be considered the spy. And he's not joining Glee club, anyway"

"Yes I am" Blaine said calmly, taking a bite from his apple- the only decent food he could find. Kurt glared at him, but he couldn't complain, since he had promised to let Blaine do his thing. "But I won't participate much if you don't want me to, and you can kick me out of the room if you want to discuss competition related things in private. I just want to sing, really. I promise."

"Well, you will still have to audition," said Rachel, trying to put some sort of obstacle, but Mercedes just laughed at her.

"Oh, please! Everyone gets in. And we _know_ he can sing, so he might as well be already in the glee club"

"Oh, damnit," Kurt said, suddenly realizing something "it _is_ Jesse all over again!" at Blaine's questioning look, Kurt elaborated "not that you're going to betray us and throw eggs at me in the parking lot, but now that you're in Glee, I really have no chance at a solo! Damn you" he said, slapping Blaine in the shoulder, not hard enough to hurt, but enough to make a point.

"Really? I mean, you have a much wider range than I do. Your voice is far more useful"

"Yeah, say that to Mr. Shue, see if he learns. And you have your stupid charm, too! You'll win him over in a second"

"You complain about my charm but you do love it," said Blaine knowingly, smiling at Kurt in a flirty way, which made the countertenor deflect the slight blush with a snort. When they both turn back to the others, they found four faces staring at them with different variations of surprise.

"Are you two…" Mercedes started, but Blaine finished the sentence for her.

"Dating, yes"

"Do you want to sign it in the sky with flying airplanes, too?" Kurt asked, sarcasm dripping from his tone but feeling slightly happy that his glee friends now knew. He had to be the spectator of too much couple drama, and he always wished he could at least play some part. Any part, really.

"That would be absurdly expensive in relation to the amount of time it lasts," analyzed Blaine, catching Kurt's sarcasm immediately, and playing along.

"Well, you can always tattoo it into your forehead," countered Kurt calmly, taking a bite of his own salad. Blaine pretended to consider the idea, and then shook his head, discarding it.

"It wouldn't read at a distance, I need to spread the message wider"

"I can't tell if they're joking or serious anymore," said Artie, in a bewildered voice, and Tina just shrugged.

Blaine just smiled at them and then took his pocket watch to check the hour, and closed it with an audible click.

"Oh, I have to run. I wanted to get a word with the football coach before I have to go to Glee. You said her name is Beiste?" he asked, standing up already.

"Yeah, B-e-i-s-t-e," Kurt replied, almost absentmindedly "it's French"

"Got it," he nodded, and bent down to drop a kiss on Kurt's temple "See you at glee, Kurt"

"Not that I have a choice," mumbled Kurt grumpily, but he was already smiling, if only a bit. Blaine just laughed and left the cafeteria, waving a goodbye to the rest of the table.

A few seconds of silence invaded the table, until Artie asked, slowly.

"Why does he need to talk to coach Beiste?"

"He's joining the football team," explained Kurt, with a pained expression on his face. Artie didn't have time to reply, because Mercedes was staring at where Blaine had left.

"Was that a pocket watch?"

"Is he shorter than you?" asked Tina, staring at the same spot Mercedes was.

Kurt simply groaned and hid his face with the palms of his hands.

"This is going to be hell!"


End file.
